Monday, April 15, 2013

I Already Miss It

This time, I slept when the baby slept.
 
 
 
I let him set the schedule.
 
 
 
This time, I didn't put him right into his crib for his nap.  He slept on my chest.
 
 
 
I celebrated the milestones, but I didn't push them.
 
 
 
I listened to advice, but I didn't take all of it.
 
 
 
I DVR'd my favorite shows to watch at 3am,
 
 
 
And I already miss it.
 
 
 
Maybe it's because I knew he is my last baby.
 
 
 
Maybe it's because this was my third time going through it all.
 

 
Maybe it's because he was and is an absolute joy.
 
 
 
But I miss my baby being a baby already.
 
 
 
With the girls, I didn't wish away time, but I was so excited for each upcoming stage, and looked forward to them growing an changing.
 
 
 
Not this time.
 
 
 
Yes, he's still only 7 months old, but he's growing, and reaching, and eating, and moving, and he's not a helpless infant any longer.  He'll be crawling any day now.  His two bottom teeth are thisclose to breaking through.  He's a growing baby boy, and I already miss it.
 
 
 
I miss those teeny newborn jammies.
 
 
 
I miss swaddling him up for bed in those lighweight, gauzy receiving blankets.
 
 
 
I miss him fitting in the crook of my arm. One arm.
 
 
 
But.
 
 
 
I love how he twists and turns until he sees me when someone else is holding him.  Then locks eyes with me and settles down.
 
 
 
I love how he sits up and reaches to play with his toys, and plunges them into his mouth to explore.
 
 
 
I love his sweet, gummy smile, and his squeaky giggle when I tickle his chest and neck.
 
 
 
I love how he sucks his thumb to relax and get himself to sleep easily.
 
 
 
I love how he gazes at his sisters and smiles and laughs at them as they interact with him.
 
 
 
My boy is growing.  He is learning, and developing, and he is happy.  He is so, so happy.
 
 
 
He is my last baby.  And I already miss it. 
 
 
 
But there are so many wonderful things that lie ahead of us. 
 
 
 
I am SO blessed as a wife, as a mother, as a woman, and I treasure these days and will look back with such warmth and love.
 
 
 
But I already miss it.
 
 
 
So when my baby boy happens to fall asleep on my chest while I'm singing him a song, I won't worry about schedules, or spoiling, or if he'll go to sleep on time tonight.
 
 
 
This time is fleeting.  And from what I've been told, it will begin to move even faster.
 
 
 
So I will sit here, with my boy asleep, and soak in these moments.
 
 
 
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2 comments:

  1. Oh my, this had me in tears, it's lie you read my mind! You are SO right!! It's too fleeting, we should soak up every second!! Xxx

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    Replies
    1. Lol! :) It's hard to remember these things when our lives as mamas are so busy, hectic and stressful, but, I mean, are we lucky or what?! We weregiven the privledge to be mamas, and what a blessing that is. :)

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